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She walks over to the side out of the way of foot traffic and then gets out her phone, swiping and tapping and flicking as I pass her, headed toward my meetings. ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~After a day of somewhat successful meetings, I go to dinner with one of my clients. Arranging with them to stop by their office sometime the next morning before returning home, but not too early, I head back to the hotel late. Walking through the lobby with my computer bag, I spy, wouldn't you know it, the same Japanese lady I'd run into twice before. Waiting for the elevator, I find myself drawn to her. She's sitting by herself in the otherwise deserted lounge area, earphones in and looking at her computer, a large bowl and an almost empty glass pushed aside. The elevator opens, but I ignore it. Just on the off chance that I could strike up a conversation with her, I decide I'll park myself nearby and pretend to work.Two tables away is the right distance – not too close to be creepy but close enough to. Reason hits me like a truck. Im killing my baby. By choosing not to eat, I am going against my word to keep him safe from harm. In my desperation to be free, I chose my life over his, no matter how unintentionally. I didnt think about the consequences of my starvation. Once again, I have forgotten about the life my body protects and how precious it is. Precious, the word feels ill-used. It would probably benefit the human race, if I let my baby die. But I know I cant. Submissive Selena and Defiant Selena both make way for the New Mother Selena as the reality finally sets in. No more selfishness, from now on I need to think about my baby first. I look up at Asmodeus and command that he release me. I refuse to be held like a criminal and fed like a child now that I have decided to cooperate. He looks reluctant to oblige. Come on! Look, I said Ill eat and I mean it, now unchain me. Now that I have remembered what is at stake I am agitated and eager to eat something as quickly as.
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